If I Stay Movie Review

    

    Excitedly walking into the theater to watch If I Stay left me with hopes that I would walk out with satisfaction and a close level of love you all know I hold for the book. 

    That didn't happen.

    Sure, I did use the tissues, but who wouldn't cry at Mia's grandfather's speech? But more tears were piercing the backs of my eyes as I watched how the film murdered the sole purpose of why I loved the book in the first place.

    Usually, I don't watch adaptations and hate them. Actually, I have never hated a book to movie adaptation before a few days ago (that is disregarding Percy Jackson, which I don't really consider an 'adaptation' anyways). But this movie discovered each and every way to pinch my nerves, annoy me tremendously, and nearly had me yelling at the big screen in front of thirty people. 

    Adam. 

    Adam.

    Adam. 

    That was all that this movie revolved around: Adam. Half the movie was filled with Mia and Adam frantically eating each others faces, not-really-in-the-book teenage sex, and Adam's reluctant attitude to be the supporting and loving boyfriend he was in the book. Most of the flash backs featured I did not recall being in the book; most scenes of Adam replaced the exceedingly important scenes of Mia's family. Sure, they still left in some crucial family scenes that supported the story's message and the emotions that it's supposed to bring, but honestly, it is like the producers just said: "Since this is based off a YA book, and our audience mainly consists of hormonal teenagers, we should add an overly generous amount of make out scenes, a hint of sex, and overly dramatic relationship problems that young adults will die for. Those kids won't care that we just made this all about teenagers' confusing relationships and completely ignored the underlying message of the power of love and choices and the immortal support of friends and family that the book revolves around."

    … 

    Do you understand what I mean?

    The reason I loved the book so much is because of the message that it dumped upon me. The realization of how much love, support, and memories were gifted upon me by my family and friends as a privileged human being. The recognition of how much I truly love and care about the people I used to take for granted. Yes, Adam was in the book, and yes, I liked him and his role in the book. I had nothing against book-Adam; in all sincerity, I loved the Adam that I read about and his and Mia's relationship. But what I really loved about the book was that it was a love story without technically being a love story. The movie butchered this aspect, making it a complete love story, that was, well, completely a love story.

    I'm not saying it was a horrible movie, but it wasn't as good as an adaption as it could've been. 

Fear

Passage voiced by the narrator of my manuscript:

 

Fear. He’s scared, she’s scared, we are all scared. Reasons. Reasons for fear. He has reasons, she has reasons, we all have reasons. A variety of reasons. Afraid of heights, spiders, and death. But deep down, we know these aren’t our real fears. They are just phobias to label, to blame, the real reason we are so terrified. Accusing smaller factors because we are scared to admit what we really fear.

We fear our reasons.  

Hypnophobia. The fear of falling to sleep, because no matter how hard I try, I can’t. I can’t sleep, but really I’m afraid to. But I know better, I know that I’m blaming an innocent factor. I’m not really afraid of falling asleep. I’m afraid of what sleep means; afraid of the thoughts that it brings to my wandering mind. Sleeping signifies the end, the end of a day. A day I didn’t do something productive; a day I didn’t work on achieving just the slightest bit of knowledge on my reason. A day wasted. I’m afraid. These thoughts flood my body like an ocean of water, the bitterness of its salt choking me. A day wasted. I only have so many days. Days to find my reason, days to accomplish my dreams, days to live, days to make sure my life isn’t wasted. Days to become somebody. That is not the fear of sleep, that is the fear of something else entirely.

Fear is strange, one of the strangest concepts. Sometimes, I wonder if fear makes us believe we are scared of the opposite of what we really are. Like when you’re alone and you are intruded by this overwhelming feeling that someone is watching you. But, what if thats not what you’re afraid really afraid of? You’ve convinced yourself that you are afraid of the imaginary psycho-murder that lives under the stairs, the psycho-murder that only is configured in your ignorant mind when you are alone. You’re not afraid of strangers watching you; you are afraid of being alone. Fear is telling you to be scared, making you believe that someone, some unknown threat, is stalking you. But, I wonder, if that is supposed to be reassuring. The idea of someone watching you is actually supposed to be comforting. Fear telling you you are not alone, since being alone is what you fear.

Afraid of heights is the fear of falling. The fear of falling is the fear of death. The fear of death is the fear of the end. The fear of the end is the fear of leaving before you’ve found your reason, accomplished your dreams. Became somebody. You’re blaming, he’s blaming, she’s blaming… We are all blaming a variety of factors for a fear that controls all. Maybe my mind is just traveling into forbidden places, just following its daily routine and spitting out daunting theories, but I believe when I say: We are all afraid of reasons.     

If I didn’t believe there was a reason, I wouldn’t be afraid. But there is a reason, so fear will always be stalking, hiding behind every corner. But I’ve realized this. I’ve realized this a long time ago. I’ve accepted it. So fear is no longer stalking and hiding. Fear does not need to fear being noticed. From now until forever, fear and I are walking hand in hand.   

If I Stay

    So, I'm currently on my mom's laptop, using her phone's hotspot, so I can write in our some-what empty, internet-less new house. Yeah. Because of this internet-less state, I've been doing a lot of reading, and much less writing. But thankfully, my Savior, The WiFi Man (or whatever you call him…) is coming tomorrow to install what our lives seem to depend on in the 21st century. I shall try to survive another 24 hours… try. 
    Since I've read a lot of books, I have a lot of things to review. But I need to make this quick for my mom's data bill's sake, thus I will do a quick review for one book. 

If I Stay:

Summary (from Goodreads):

Just listen, Adam says with a voice that sounds like shrapnel.

I open my eyes wide now.
I sit up as much as I can.
And I listen.

Stay, he says.

Choices. Seventeen-year-old Mia is faced with some tough ones: Stay true to her first love—music—even if it means losing her boyfriend and leaving her family and friends behind?

Then one February morning Mia goes for a drive with her family, and in an instant, everything changes. Suddenly, all the choices are gone, except one. And it's the only one that matters.

If I Stay is a heartachingly beautiful book about the power of love, the true meaning of family, and the choices we all make. 

Review:

    If I had to use one word to describe this book, it would be genuine. I thoroughly enjoyed reading this  book, not just because I have a soft spot for utterly depressing books that force me to swim in an ocean of tears and used tissues, but because of the truthful messages it portrays through its short 201 pages. 

    Staying or leaving. Those were the two options seventeen year old Mia had when she was put into a comma by a car accident that killed her family. She was giving up on life. This novel replays her life, the reasons to stay along with the reasons to leave. This book made me realize that life is short and death is always stalking your wake, you never know when it will make a fatal attack. Reading Mia's thoughts in the hospital brought me to understanding just how difficult it would be to be stuck in a position that would demand someone to make such a choice. In the beginning, I didn't see how she thought there was even an other option, she had to stay. I thought if I was in her position, I would stay too. But the more I read, the more I understood why she wanted to let go. I realized, that in reality, if this horrible event had happened to me, it would be incredibly difficult for me to choose whether to stay and live the rest of my life, or leave and die along with my family. 

    I loved this book, definitely a five out of five in my opinion. I would recommend it, especially since the movie is going to be released August 22! I'm so excited! 

Movie Trailer: